Reader Question:

This guy and I currently talking for about 3 years. We never been in a relationship but have been intimate on a few occasions.

Not long ago I desired to go after a commitment. He got mad at myself and informed me he isn’t prepared. The guy ceased speaking with me personally for a few days. I told him if our very own friendship can last, a relationship isn’t important.

Do you really believe he’ll actually change? Do I need to delay for him?

-Shakia (Massachusetts)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Solution:

Dear Shakia,

He’ll perhaps not change if you remain exactly the same. All their requirements are met right here. He’s got no reason at all to go into a romantic union if he is able to get most of the benefits and never having to devote.

He even tried you by cutting off communication for three days. And you also arrived working returning to maintain the old, unfulfilling relationship.

My advice: make sure he understands demonstrably when he’s ready to have a proper, dedicated, romantic relationship, the guy should phone you, but before this, you may be unavailable.

Then do not get weak and leave him draw you back to the existing system. No texting. No calling. No Twitter stalking.

My personal hunch so is this is not necessarily the man available, but this relationship is actually in some way maintaining you against fulfilling a truly great man.

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